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Why a breakup doesn’t equal failure
A relationship is a great thing and a great way to relate with someone you love or crush on but it is also important to understand that a breakup doesn’t equal failure if it doesn’t work out a plan.
A relationship is not a do-or-die affair, it is a matter of the heart, which means that we have every right to choose what and the kind of person we want to be with.
So if you try a relationship out with someone that you thought was perfect for you, then at the end or in the process, you now discover that he or she is not the right one for you that there is a lot of difference between you two or that he or she is so perfect for you, don’t sit down and endure it because you thought that if you leave you will be seen as a failure. Because a breakup doesn’t equal failure.
If you want to know, you break up with someone who doesn’t deserve you or who is way too different from you, means you are courageous because it takes only courage and self-worth to break loose from it without thinking of what people will say.
Many people see people who break up in their relationship as failures, not capable of loving someone, etc but that’s not true, a break doesn’t equal failure, it equals liberation.
Yeah, liberation because nothing feels so relieved like breaking loose from every bondage in the name of a relationship.
-‘‘-How do you know when a relationship turns to a bondage‘—-
i. When you have no freedom of speech.
ii. When you are in a relationship yet you still feel single.
iii. When you are in a relationship just to keep your parents off your back
iv. When you are scared just because your spouse returns home from work.
v. When you are physically, emotionally, mentally abused.
vi. When you are less than yourself.
vii. When you have no more self-confidence in anything you do in your spouse’s presence. And so other more.
—- when to break up with someone you love—
1. Love is reciprocal which means that when you love someone, you should be loved in return, it may not be in the same measure it’s either more than or less than what you offer. But when you don’t even get any of that, then it’s time to let go.
Note: Whatever you manage or endure, you will continue to endure to the end. Yeah because any day you want to change the pattern, you will have issues.
Do you know why??? I will tell you, it is because you have made him or her get so used to it from the very start. Beware of what you introduce into your relationship.
2. When you are physically, mentally, emotionally abuse regularly.
3. When you are tired of begging for attention.
4. When he or she is reluctant about the relationship.
5. When space is the right thing to regain your balance.
6. When all that you try doing for the relationship looks like a waste of time.
7. When you are not appreciated.
8. When his or her family becomes the ones that run the affairs of the relationship
9. When he is not ready to take responsibility.
10. When you are turned into a maid.
11. When he or she publicly ridicules you.
—–Break up reasons—-
There are so many reasons for a break up according to every one of us. Before we act, we think, while some act before they think, but what matters is that there is a breakup and there is a reason attached and we called it ” break up reasons”.
Some of the beak up reasons are;
1. When we realized that the person we are with is not compatible.
2. Most times is caused by confusion.
3. Misunderstanding
4. Pressure from people etc
5. The spark is gone
6. He or she cheats on you
7. He or she is not your type
8. You don’t like her of him anymore
9. Some people break up because they need a space to think.
—break up texts——
Although it is not proper or mature enough to send a breakup text to someone over a phone.
If you think that you can’t deal with the person anymore, the best thing to do is to sit face to face with the person and table out things.
Some text messages have the power to take someone off balance unknown to you.
But some moderate break up texts you can use are;
1. I need a space or a break to think.
2. We are better off as friends.
3. I’m in love with someone else.
4. I can’t do this anymore I’m sorry
5. Let’s just be friends
6. Let’s call it quits.
7. I can’t fake to still love you while the love is no more there, I’m sorry
8. It’s over, please.
9. I’m sorry. But I can’t waste my time anymore.
—After the break up what next—-
Well, this is where individual differences come into play. There are people that you can’t even ask after a break up with next, all because you have already gotten your answer by what you are seeing. Etc.
1. some people break up because they want to flirt with someone else and when the breakup finally takes place, they move on immediately with a new relationship.
2. Life continues; you may not go into another relationship with someone else immediately but that doesn’t mean that you will stop living and makes life so bitter for yourself
After all, being said, now let’s look at
why break up doesn’t equal failure-
1. You were never in a competition with anyone.
2. You hold the key to your happiness, not people.
3. It’s your life
4. It’s not a game it is a matter of the heart.
5. It is not a do-or-die affair.
6. It’s a relationship, not marriage.
7. It is not a must that every relationship must result in marriage.
8. It was just a moment.
9. It is a mission to find the right partner for the future, not the other way round. This means that you can always turn right or left anytime until you reach the final destination.
10. Break up doesn’t equal failure because it is better to have a broken relationship than to have a broken marriage.
11. You know who you are and what you want, and it takes a lot to make that decision of breaking loose from the relationship especially if you truly loved the person. But in one way or the other, it didn’t work out as you planned and expected.
Once you understand that having a relationship with someone does not mean complete ownership then whatever people think about you, will not be a problem anymore.
Do you think that break up equals failure? Let’s hear from you.