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Nollywood star Deyemi Okanlawon recently has advised both men and women to avoid getting into relationships if they are not financially bouyant.
The actor Deyemi has stated on his Twitter page that getting into a committed relationship while one is not financially secure is not a good idea for either a man or a woman.
He claims that now is the time for someone to start developing themselves to the point where they can be independent rather than fixing themselves in a committed relationship.
He wrote:
“If you’re not yet financially buoyant perhaps it is wise to take a break from a “serious” relationship and focus on building yourself… this message from the federal association of common sense is for men & women”.
“Everyone should feel free to love and date anyone at any time/stage of their lives if they so choose… but perhaps for more serious (intentional, committed) relationships you may want to approach things slightly differently?”
If you're not yet financially buoyant perhaps it is wise take a break from "serious" relationship and focus on building yourself… this message from the federal association of common sense is for men & women #openletter#butwhatdoiknow
Dumping someone for someone else has become so rampant that most youth use it as fun without knowing the implication of it nor the effect it carries especially if you were not aware of the signs you’re about to get dumped
But it is obvious that breakups do not just happen or come out of nowhere but it’s from that small changes that occur in the relationship or marriage.
So in this article, I have gather some flags you should look out for in your relationship or marriage.
Signs you’re about to get dumped are as follows:
[bctt tweet="
PHONE CALLS BECOMES BORING
LESS COMMUNICATION
YOU DISGUST HIM/HER
LOST OF INTEREST
LESS ATTENTION
SPACE AND TIME
."]
PHONE CALLS BECOMES BORING
LESS COMMUNICATION
YOU DISGUST HIM/HER
LOST OF INTEREST
LESS ATTENTION
SPACE AND TIME
PHONE CALLS BECOMES BORING: Phone calls start becoming less frequent, he/she can stay a
day or two without calling you and still feel well okay without you.
He doesn’t even mind if you call him or not. “For example, if you normally talk twice a day, and
all of a sudden, it’s just a text or nothing at all… well, look out, that could be a sign of danger.”
LESS COMMUNICATION: Perhaps we all know that communication act the highest role in every
healthy relationship. You want to know why?
It is because is the key factor in any relationship. It is during communication that tables get
shaken.
You cannot stop what needs to be stopped nor silent what needs to be silent without having a communication.
that’s why during prayers, we are actually communicating with God.
So without communication in a relationship, that relationship is doom.
N/B nothing good can come out of a relationship that does not involved communication.
YOU DISGUST HIM OR HER: He speaks, criticizes you on every small issues that occur.
It is true that is not everything your partner nor you do that is that great to your standards and with that, there will always be a debate from time to time.
But when everything you do annoys your partner, everything you do is wrong in his eyes, like
the way you laugh, the way you speak, the way you associate yourself with his family or maybe
your friends or his own friends, just know that it is heading nowhere.
Don’t let anyone change you from your positive nature because one day, he will still leave you
for a partner who knows how to associate with his family and friends.
Before you think of getting married to that beautiful lady, handsome man, there is always something you need to do to avoid mistakes, there are some of the couple questions you need to ask yourself before a step into a home.
Many homes are destroyed and divorce today because of avoiding those things they were to considered before becoming a couple.
Marriage is a beautiful thing, is like heaven on earth, seeing yourself with your kids, and husband/wife, but it is like hell when you are with the wrong person who wasn’t made for you.
Don’t be too carried away because you want to get married, that’s why in this article, I will be giving you some important couple questions in which you need to sit down and think about them before saying “Yes I do”
Below are some of the couple questions you need to ask;
VISION: When we go for a man with television and leave
a man with a vision there is a possibility of marrying the wrong
person. But still, that doesn’t mean that it is taboo for a man
with a vision to also get a television.
Don’t use that as an excuse to cage someone’s daughter in
perpetual poverty just because you have a vision that made
never manifests because you do nothing about it. If you have a
vision, work on it in and on time not until when she leaves you
your eye now open. (and please if you don’t work on the vision
you have while she is still with you and after some years of her
spending with you and she now decides to move on, please don’t
call her a hole digger because no one is in love with poverty.
As a lady, is that the kind of man you want? If you are not sure, sit down with him, bring out some of the couple questions and let him tell you his plans, if it is in line with yours, then you should know what next to do in other to grow together.
SEX: Yes, I said it. when sex is too early and nice we think
that’s it we are sexually satisfied we don’t care about any other
thing outside that.
Sex makes a GMR – Genetically Modified Relationship, early
maturing… Instead of thinking about how to make the
relationship better, we start thinking of how to make the next sex
escapade better. we don’t check other aspects if the man is good
for a life partner instead we check if he is good in bed.
If Se* is not really why you want to get married, then ask yourself some of the couple questions like; After marrying him or her, will I have happiness and enjoy my marriage, or will it only be when we are in the bedroom?
Even the scripture says; “the love of money is the root of evil or
maybe even route to all evil”…
Money is a spirit and it can make us become a couple with evil, wrong people.
For example: when a guy has money, different kinds of ladies are
attracted to him including snakes and with that, he will be
confused about who to marry. He will start seeing the decent ladies
has so straight.
In the manner, when a lady has money, some good guys with low
self-esteem get scared of her because of her wealth…
And with that, she only ends up with chaps with nothing to offer
except for their funny English accent…
With too much money it is difficult to make a great choice when it
comes to marriage.
Too much money gives you too much access to the wrong chaps…
And if you are not careful, you end up marrying a cadre. By the
way, cadres are always up for sale to the highest bidder.
Ask yourself a couple of questions; am I marrying for love or for money? If you have peace of mind after this, then you can decide what next to do.
Never marry for money, because one day, you might regret it.
CHURCH:
In the circular world, it is said you are allowed to kiss a
few frogs before you meet your prince or princess charming.
But many churches do not tolerate this. If you keep changing partners, it leads to immorality.
So with this, you are compelled to stick with one church member even without the atom of love just because of fear of what the members will say, you keep faking to be a happy couple.
He could be prayerful and a candidate for heaven, yes, but marrying them, you start experiencing hell on earth.
Just because he or she can speak in tongues does not mean that
they know how to speak to a partner.
At the time, is because you don’t want to disappoint papa, even without knowing if papa will disapprove the union if you go to him but because of fear, you stay
and end up marrying the wrong person.
The Couple questions: Am I in control of my home or the church? Is it through God’s will? Lord if it is your will, speak to me. Have you ever been asked him to show you a sign before? If not, this is the right time to do that.
PHYSICAL ATTRACTION:
many people lose out because of this point. they want people
with class, people with high profiles, they end rejecting the good
ones because they are busy looking for chaps.
Going for a shining star is not taboo but when you are looking
for it in the wrong place and at the wrong time is the case.
Are you looking for hips, six-pack? Don’t let those hips deceive
you, don’t let that six-pack cheat you…
There is more to marriage than slay king, slay Queen.
Beauty becomes an added advantage when you marry the right person.
But the chap you married because of beauty, becomes a beast. (the couple is warned)..
A couple of questions: Does his or her looks speak the same as his heart? Does he have a beautiful heart just like his physical looks?
In a family, there is always that one aunt or uncle from the
the village who thinks they know better who we should marry; “no,
you can’t marry that tribe.. no you can’t marry someone with
such a career, Iyammi ami udotto (that one doesn’t suit you)”.
And before we know it, we are choosing and marrying for our
the family instead of doing it for ourselves. Some of us are in the wrong
relationships right now because our friends told us that another guy
was not cool enough.
We had no idea what they meant but we listened to them… And
now we are dating and almost marrying the wrong person just
because we had no courage to stand on our own decision, we
allow our friends to decide for us which at times 30% was a good
advice while 70% is wrong. choose who to couple with wisely.
A couple of questions: If this marriage is a wrong choice, who is going to face the trauma? Is it going to be my home that I will have a voice or is it going to be run by our parents in which they will almost all the decisions for you?
Don’t make the mistake of ending up with the wrong person because you will not like the taste of it.
